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Showing posts with label ten tips to prevent rape. Show all posts
Showing posts with label ten tips to prevent rape. Show all posts

Thursday, March 5, 2015

India's Daughter

Village Belle by Raja Ravi Varma 

I watched the documentary, India's Daughter today. I couldn't bear to listen to most of the men in there, including. and especially, the literate lawyers -hard  to watch the whole documentary. For a while, I was at a loss for words. Disturbing, heartwrenching, and terribly real. The mindset of the majority of citizens of a democratic nation, that prides itself on its culture! I was lamenting about a few hate mails I received after a story of mine was published a long time ago. Why am I even surprised? I just saw and listened to a few representatives of the educated males in our capital city of New Delhi, in modern day India. But watching this should be mandatory in India.By the way, to the lawyers- even a girl going out with her own father or brother is not left alone by anti-social elements like these.  But then I am sure people like these lawyers and many religious persons still would not get the message. That girls shouldn't walk outside their homes at all,  would be the lesson that  they would want us to take away from this. Better, let them all kill themselves! Which they do do to the unborn female child.
Even elderly nuns in convents are not safe, when it comes to insecure men wanting to reinforce their sense of power. News - Elderly Indian nun raped . I cannot forget what those misguided, cruel, pathetic, stupid  men did to Jyoti. I cannot forget her dreams, her hopes. Her mother's eyes. And this will and should haunt us forever.  I am so ashamed of my country, of its so-called "tradition" and "culture". 

It was hard to see even the hope of the protesters, for change, for a better tomorrow. . This is one time when I value the merits of a brutal, long drawn out war that will affect the whole of India, but which took the men out of India, into other countries.  That is the one long term change that came out of the world wars, in the West.  Women had to take over. They came into their own, in spite of the loss of lives. The sacrifice had an unforeseen effect of women's liberation.  Of course I do not want needless deaths of men.  or women, which is what is happening now. If we could learn something from history, without bloodshed and killings, that is it. Education is the answer. How - that is the question. How to educate? What modes to use? Through travel, and exposure to other cultures? Through classes? Movies? TV? As it is, las I mentioned before.  even if many of them saw this movie, I know what many Indians -men and women - would say , shaking their heads - the girl shouldn't have gone out at night. They just wouldn't get the message, or pretend not to get it. And when  they do that, they are denying the humanity of their daughters and sons. Forgetting the real meaning of civilization.

But why am I racking my brains as to how to stop men from behaving inhumanly? Strict enforcement of a just law is all that is needed. Where the responsibility to not to commit evil deeds is on the individual. For instance, disbar and dismiss those lawyers, politicians, policemen etc  who nurture such inhuman notions about women. If they still do not understand, throw them in the jail with the other rapists. After all, we did manage to eradicate caste system, at least in certain parts of India. According to that old tradition, the lower caste women were considered untouchable, but at the same time, playthings for the high caste. Much like the other tradition of slavery, and the feudal system. Strict enforcement of the law did help with those. But then gender inequality is of benefit to all men - regardless of class or race. So the number of people who will feel cheated out of their "rights" is higher. And they won't let go off their "rights" that easily. So the struggle becomes harder.

For Catholics, in the Ten Commandments - thou shalt not kill does not put the onus on the victim, but on the perpetrator. But in the case of rape, the law in India seem to think that the victim is the culprit. Once that attitude changes, things will fall in place rather nicely. The eleventh commandment should be "thou shalt not rape". 

I found this on the internet. Seemed very helpful.


11. When you see a woman walking with a man, do not rape her.
12. When you see a woman walking with a child, do not rape her.
13. When you see a woman walking with another woman, do not rape her.

14. If you feel you are a thorn, and the woman is a flower, hit your head, repeatedly, on a stone or brick wall, whatever is convenient, and knock yourself out.
15.Use the buddy system here too if you fail to remember the above. Ask a trusted friend to bring a rock or brick to knock you out.


Still, I am hopeful for India's men and women. Looking at the thousands of girls and women protesting in the streets. Their courage, their hope, and their strength. I see the change right there. This would not be seen thirty years ago. These are the women of my generation, and their daughters. I can only bow my head before them. I am so proud of them, of how far we have come. I am ashamed of myself because I ran away from my country. It was escapist. 
The struggle has just begun, and it should include all humane beings - women and men. Because just like that assumption that women are basically "sex" (as in the words of that lawyer) and so need to be controlled, while in the same breath he said that women are "flowers" to be protected - that is what we have to face. Who on earth can live according to that contradictory idea? And the other assumption that all men are savage beings who are less than human who have no control over their own minds, and no intelligence to take responsibilty for their own actions,  or do not have the least bit of sensitivity to think of a girl or woman as a human being. That is degrading our own fathers, brothers, and sons.