of mindfulness, and also of other less savory matters

Suddenly that word is everywhere - "mindfulness". There have been debates about its actual meaning. The word has its roots in Pali, and also in Sanskrit. It originates from Buddhist principles. This is how I understood it, after reading a little about it. Mindfulness is "to be aware". To be aware of the moment. Free from judgment. Just to be. It is a presence of mind where one accepts without confusion, what each moment brings - the emotions, the thoughts, the plans for future, the whole experience.

I think that in this age of self-conscious living, 'mindfulness", which is another level of consciousness, can be of great benefit. For instance it can aid in creating an empathetic society, not unlike the Buddhist ideal. Or that of other religions. Where it could differ is that it could in practice go beyond mere religious to- the- letter morality, where  great power is wielded by leaders who soon forget how to be compassionate or humane. Where we covertly do whatever we like without thinking of another's pain or humiliation, while we judge others openly.

( I just had to touch on that "kiss-revolution" going on in my state, Kerala. The older generation and some of the "holier-than-thou" younger generation reproach and condemn that as immoral and against tradition and altogether sleazy. But then that is their way of controlling the progressive youth, especially girls, of any generation. These judging hypocrites (who have done this and much more against true morality in their lives behind closed doors - including rape and murder of women and little boys and girls), conveniently forget that this whole drama started as an act of protest. They want to erase that true spirit behind it and instead focus everyone's attention on the supposed debauchery of these young people, destroy the morale of the activists.What better way to suppress it than to instill fear in the girls' minds by branding them as loose women who were asking for it? And unleash  anti-social elements, like rabid animals into their midst, as punishment? The so-called 'traditionalists" and "culture-ists" should hang their heads in shame.

I remember an incident from long ago during my university days. In our university auditorium, it was segregated seating - boys on one side, girls on the other. There was this program there once which was held by the students. The usual songs, dances, skits etc on the stage. Every time something like this took place, the girls' side would be full and the boys' section half-empty. What more, the girls sitting at the very back had to endure the catcalls and other stuff from the crowd immediately behind them - all men, not necessarily university students. Well, this time, when my friends and I got there, the girls' side was almost totally full. And I could see the hooligans at the back just waiting for us to get there, with unconcealed glee. If we were to stick to our designated sphere, we would have to go to this problem area. And the boys' side was totally empty. So according to my suggestion, my friends and I went and sat in the second row of the boys' side. Well, it was a statement on my part. It was not because I wanted to sit near boys. In fact we were 5 or 6 girls sitting together. and the chairs around us were vacant. And there was no boy there that I wanted to sit near to. Or may be the one that  I would've liked to sit next to, was not there! (not that even if he were there, I would have! )Anyway, before the program started, a Student leader came to us, and called us outside. He told me in a sleazy manner that they all would love to "interact" with girls "closely". He did some insinuating innuendo-filled gesture with his hands when he said that. Then he went on to say that we will not be allowed to sit there for our own protection. Protection from whom? From him? Yes, we would need it. But he should not have assumed that all the rest of the men there were like him. It was a University after all. But then he had a small group of similar-thinking sheepish looking guys with him, who seemed to agree with him. I will never forget the sarcastic tone and the salacious expression on his face when he gave his speech. And he was supposed to be an enlightened student. A leftist revolutionary. I felt humiliated, angry, powerless, and incredibly sad thinking of our society, of our girls.  We walked out of that place that day. So I know  how people can distort the truth, erase the spirit and the ideal behind situations, by degrading and maligning the act of protest, and focusing on incredibly spurious ideas that maintain the status quo. Women are not allowed to step out of the slots handed down to them by the males. They pretend not to understand that women do not want to step out into the world just to sleep with all men. Now if they had practised true mindfulness, they would think differently, with compassion, knowing the plight of women in my country, understanding  the need for change.)

On the other hand, this mindfulness  holds higher and evolving standards.  The advantage of this way of living -- as a mindful subject -- is that even if one does not believe in a God, you can still be a fully evolved human being.Or at least on our way to being one. Because when we  practice mindfulness we begin with our own minds.  We focus on what goes on in there. Each one of us is our own authority. Not some religious leader. We become responsible for our thought and thereby for our actions. We owe it to ourselves to be good and kind. When each person is good and kind to his or her own self, (because it makes him or her feel better on the whole) , then that could extend outward and spread and reach the whole society.

Mindfulness can be practiced, as in meditation. It is being used in many areas of our lives these days. Many government agencies, hospitals, schools, businesses and such have started using it as stress-reducing /healing method. Nothing wrong in that, as far as I can see. There is that fear in many scholars that commercialization of mindfulness will make us forget the real spirit of the whole process. Which is "social harmony" and compassion. They fear that it may just teach people to adapt to stress, for instance, rather than deal with the cause of that stress or strife in a compassionate, wise, and humane manner -- in other words, in the manner of that evolved being. Which is what the underlying ideals of many religions are, but everyone conveniently or ignorantly forgets that part. (And those who are really clever and successful in this world know how to use those ideals without themselves following them, to their advantage. But that is another story).

For me, the immediate step in mindfulness is that I would start with breathing mindfully. anything easy, I can do! Stop. Stand up straight. Shoulders back. Tummy in.  and take that deep slow breath, and exhale. That is centering. And cleansing. And then, I can use mindfulness when I eat.

Poetry Points - How (not) to write Poems

the poet 

I have noticed that I am always ready to preach, but not to practise. Especially when it comes to writing. It could be that I am pretending to myself that  that is the reason I am not a great writer, or a famous writer. I prefer to overlook the highly possible fact that I just do not have what it takes to be one.
Anyway here goes, - now that I know for sure that I am never going to amount to much, and that I never did, I can dole out advice freely. Time to grow up.

To  budding poets/writers, especially those whose mother tongue is not English :

We all know good poetry is sincere. That it is authentic, and arises out of the heart and mind of the poet, his/her experience/knowledge - from a variety of sources.

Poetry is the spontaneous overflow of powerful emotions, Wordsworth did write that. Coleridge took it a bit further. And we in India read the 19th century English Romantic poets more than anybody else, at least that was how it was in my time. Of course we did read others. But somehow for us back then the Romantics embodied greatness. They were the role models. That perspective could backfire sometimes. Great, original poetry was written by them, or so we think, rightly or not.. Colonialism did affect our thinking.  Still, what they wrote then still manage to amaze us. Times have changed. For us now, we can be inspired by them, however, unless we have some new way of talking of those same themes, we have to find different subjects.That of our time. There are some ideals  that will always be the same, such as love. But even that has changed. New versions or rather supposedly new versions have appeared  However old or new these versions are, we will have to find new ways to describe it. To write poems about it. So let the emotions and ideas fester in the mind. Take the time to make it your own. Turn it over and around, think how to enrich it using the knowledge you have gained. Which process you already do, I know. Do more of that. Read more, live more. Books from all lands, from our own land, from the present, the past, movies, music, science, philosophy, the internet, and art, and travel are some ways to gain more knowledge, expand our perceptions.

Talking of the Romantics, be very careful when writing nature poems generally. That's because many of  those descriptions and imagery  have been overused down the line, and nowadays they are everywhere, from old romantic poems, from  new and old love songs to Hallmark cards.  Thus, sadly, the golden orbs of the sky, the transient dewdrops, "beaded bubbles winking at the brim", darkling anything and unquenched desires have all become trite. Let's say that those Romantics have among themselves pretty much exhausted all the yearning sighs of lovers, the arching azureness of the heavens, and the writhing demons of desire for the forbidden. You can still write about Nature, and desire, and love, and death - in refreshing new ways. Using unexpected but unpretentious words and images that make sense and that make the reader stop and think. They could be ones of fantasy, of the modern times, of the past, of the great treasure chest of mythology, gritty and/ or charming, and/or rural or urban, suburban, and much much more.

Apart from the usual culprit named grammar, there is one common element that most new writers of poetry misuse. Ellipsis - those 3 dots -  is not a  device to be used indiscriminately. It is not there to prove that a piece of writing is indeed a poem. We all know we are reading a poem when we read one. No need of ellipsis just for that. Use it sparingly, for the most effect. Same with the overuse of "like" for introducing similes.  When you delete just those two factors itself, things change. Getting your meaning across would be a little less easy. That might entail a lot of reworking of the whole piece. But it will make one think beyond the usual clichés, and make the poem fresh. Most poems could benefit from an overhaul. Make it shorter, denser with apt but unpretentious devices, make it more succinct . Better to have drama rather than melodrama, I think. 

Be careful when you are determined to  write rhymed verse, sometimes they look too forced. Especially when you pick up weird but rhyming words from the thesaurus. Poetry should flow naturally. So is with the use of uncommon words. That just looks pretentious, and many readers will not bother to find out the real meaning. Loss of communication. Some use "nay" and prithee and thee for their poems which, let us say, is amusing. And a lot of question marks, and words in all capital letters to make a point, or to show someone is shouting. ( I have done that!)  I am enjoying writing this! It sure feels good to pontificate!

Also, I do not think readers enjoy too much preaching/pontificating in poems. High morals and ideals, and observations of that nature are good, actually it shows an observant mind. But a poet has to go beyond just stating the facts. Show the pitfalls of evil or sin in simple but symbolic ways. For poems in general, I prefer “showing” rather than “telling”. Or a good balance of show and tell. Again, read more, observe more, think more, live more, I guess. Poetry is an attempt to transcend the concrete, using various poetic devices and at the same time, capture it. It should make the reader feel and think beyond what is written in the poem. I am not asking  that a poet should be obscure, but the poem should spark, trigger ideas in the reader's mind. Provoke. Inspire.  Just my opinion. 

Early poems, say of a very young person, are useful in the sense that the reader can see how an imaginative, intelligent young person  with a good grasp of the English language saw the world around him or her at a certain point in time. But many creative young persons have done the same, which is fine too. But when they all do it in rather similar ways,  it stops being that special. But it still could be special for some readers. Here's where knowing your audience works. Who are you writing for? For yourself? Then it's all fine. For young people of your age? They may like them. For a few youth of your age? Sure, some will like them. Now, how about older readers? And we are talking of the ones who like to read poetry. How about an international reader?  I am not sure how they will read them. What I am sure of is that if the poems are good, they will see that there is potential, and there is time before you, to get the experience, through just living, through books, movies, music, works of art, through travelling. A talented, aspiring poet should realize that not all are literary minded. Not even students of literature. They are not able to write or think like you. You are different. You can write. You are  budding writers. And it takes time and work to be  great writers.

  I do not consider myself to be a poet, let alone a good one. I am guilty of many of the issues I have mentioned. And I am too lazy to change, and that may be one, just one, of the reasons that I am still unpublished by an established publishing house. Remember what I said in the beginning? Fooling myself. But  I can recognize good poetry when I see it, most of the time! I may be totally wrong too in my opinions. Appreciation of poetry is totally personal. Ask others to read the poems, (criticism hurts, but it helps too, they say) maybe an English teacher of yours, or a published writer - not a self-published one, preferably.  In this age of self-publishing, and success through effective marketing, or by "going viral" (yikes!), or by just having a group of enthusiastic, supportive friends and  as all of you happen to live in a big city, where they can even start a publishing house for you, and/or if you are web-savvy, anyone can be a writer. Well, these days they have courses in creative writing. But to be  writers whose writings stand the test of time, to rise above mediocrity - that is the ideal. And I believe a moderately talented, determined person can do it, with a little bit of luck . 

However, it is your choice that matters the most, when it comes to publishing right away. Choose your favorite ones, work on them if you feel like they need work, after hearing competent readers' take on them. Those should not be confined to your usual set of admirers, made up of people who dislike any kind of creative writing, or who just read comic books and romances,  your love struck boyfriend or girlfriend, or an apparent hotshot connoisseur whom you met online who is really just angling for a bit of romance on the side, via the net or via Main Street/M.G. Road, your younger siblings , (guilty here )or just one of your indulgent teachers who thinks the world of you because you have a good vocabulary, and you are one of the few who could write a complete sentence without making any spelling or grammar mistakes, and because, maybe unconsciously, you walk around thinking you are Keats or Emily Dickinson, and managed to fool them too!

Don't be afraid that a good critic or fellow poet will steal your thoughts, or that they will be envious and put you down on purpose.  Not that that does not happen, it does. But most often, your current attempts are not that original or perfect for them to copy. I may be wrong about that too now. Some would-be poets and novelists avoid reading others' poems and works of fiction fearing that they would be influenced. As if their very unique genius, and sublime innocence and purity of thought will be tainted by the others' views. The noble savage has to remain so! The other fear is different - what if the other person is better than you? And you think that might make you feel anxious and jealous and leave you unable to focus. Another fear is that of failure. What if no one likes your work? And at the other end are those who fear success even before they taste it! So they sabotage themselves in many ways. Fear and laziness - two evils that pull us down. Look who's talking! 

In spite of all that, if you think your poems are good as they are, I respect that too. After all, you are the author. And you only live once, and this is the age of self-conscious living! (I did it! - I went and self-published my 2 books. For my first novel, I did the "query" thing -- did not work. So went the digital publishing way. The second one, the poem thing, I just didn't bother doing the query procedure - I knew my poems were nothing to write home about. Anyway I avoided the pain of rejection and by that also the joy of recognition. Lesson learned - no pain, no gain. The only difference between you and me - I am older, and do not have time and youth on my side now). Besides, you won't be around to see if your work stood the test of time!

The suggestion is to wait. And then write, and rewrite incorporating new insights.I know many writers or aspiring writers cannot bear to rewrite and revise. I am one of those. But I also know that revising and reworking our writings will make them all the more substantial, rich and polished.  If there is talent, that  needs to be nourished, sustained, and grown. I have heard drugs and alcohol fuels the imagination and many a great writer and artist have used that throughout history. In fact there seems to be a huge market for redeemed addicts' - that is with addiction of any kind, love, religion,sex, drug, alcohol, food,politics--  writings. Well, that can mean that they are passionate about something, or that they are intrepid warriors of experimentations, those who are not controlled by boundaries. But let me make it clear to you young writers - I do not recommend that. Why? For one, most of the time those artistes/artists are too much into their experimental living that they are unable to enjoy their talent(s). For two, they just get stuck in the experiment and not in their art. The greatest among them do not see their own fame or popularity in their own lifetimes. Be sensible, or not. But take care of your body and mind. Make reading  your addiction, if you will.

Now, there are those who are physically enabled to be highly creative artists, they say. Synesthetes like Vladimir Nabokov, tetrachromats like Concheta Antico may have used their special gifts in their creative endeavor. Some say people can be trained to see and feel the world like them. Till then, for the rest of us, good old reading and living and talking and thinking will have to do.

age of self-conscious living-- part 3 or 4?

My fascination with the blurring of boundaries between the real and  the unreal goes hand in hand with my fascination for the age of self-conscious living. This is the third or fourth time I am writing about it. trying to articulate the ideas in my head. Recently I read an article in Time, about Oprah. Now, I admire Oprah, and the writer of this article does too, as he writes about not Oprah in particular, but her new cable channel, OWN -- Oprah Winfrey Network. I do not know where to start! The ideas that ran in my mind as I was reading this article! virtual wild horses waiting to be caught! and tamed! familiar ideas that sounded almost crazy suddenly turned probable and real!
Oprah embodies the spirit and substance of "celebrity". As I said before, we all want to be 'celebrities" in our own ways. The writer of the above article concludes his article thus, "your best self, it turns out, is a self with a show on Oprah's network." What is your "best self'?" We have read and heard a million answers for that. A host of religions attempt to teach you that. But in the present world of democratized media, what constitutes "best self"? To me, that would be a self whose existence has been validated, is being validated. Who validates it? Myself, I could say, like a million self-help books tell me, but i would say it is others. My existence is validated by other selves, the world. And what better way than being in the media? No wonder these reality-tv shows are not going away anytime soon.
And you cannot say that celebrities are just twinkling stars that do just that -- twinkle. it takes a George Clooney to bring Sudan to your attention. It is his idea about the satellite in the sky over that troubled spot that is being put to work right now. His voice is heard, his movements are followed, and there is his power to make things happen. Like Oprah. So the age of self-conscious living , the age of TV living is here as a natural evolutionary force in our existence. I do not know the "real" Oprah. I just know the "virtual" Oprah. And this virtual Oprah changes lives. Inspires others to be life-changing celebrities.yes, your best self is your virtual self!
Now, in this age of self-conscious living, we are all characters in a virtual world. We are heroes -- tragic at times, with one great flaw, comic at other times laughing at ourselves. Movies are made of our thoughts, ideas and what we see. Great or funny music accompanies us, those same thoughts and ideas. We are significant beings whose existences are valid. Valid enough to be seen and heard on a global platform by other valid beings.We are all walking movies, at the same time, we are all moviemakers. We are the "best selves" living in a "self-conscious" world of which we are very aware, a world which has to notice us in turn.

Age of self-conscious living - part 3

Modern human is a showman, or woman. The adoring public gives meaning to his/her existence. It is for them that we perform. The validation of our existence, as I said before. Many of us try to give the performance of our lives, be it to our immediate family and friends, or to the world in general, with some faces thrown in for that personal touch and inspiration. Some take it to the extreme of course, and some to the extent that it becomes a freak show. The age of self-conscious living. We of course announce that we do it for ourselves. But imagine if there wasn't an audience! People to applaud and envy you? I dare say it wouldn't be half as much fun. So the bigger the performance, the bigger the applause, and the bigger the satisfaction, especially when  you assume that you are the best, and that you have the most enchanted life. What a wonderful feeling it must be to think that all the rest are plodding idiots waiting to hear about your next exploit?

There is a romance and drama in being single too,. So when one is seemingly unattached one looks freer and then the more the envy and admiration. This applies more to the single man than to the woman. Because the usual thinking is that the man chooses to stay single, and the woman, because she couldn't get a man. But the majority of the spectators prefer to watch and enjoy, while trying to create a smaller scale version of the drama in their own lives. While the "free" one continues giving the show of his or her life.

While before it was just a handful who did this on a world stage, now, in this age of globalized demoracy, and explosion of media, all of us train and aspire to be heroes and heroines, in whatever way we can.  Some sign up for reality TV, others write blogs, books, everyone twitters their daily activities, as if  we make the news, or that we are news.  The age of the internet calls for new  kinds of relationships, terminologies and ideals. So, naturally, crash courses in spoken netword becomes necessary. Idioms and usages specifically aimed at different types. "Follow your heart" and "chill" are used indiscriminately. Along with pep talk phrases. In the end, when we all want to be unique and different,  what we have is a group of ageing people trying to hold on to their youth. Clones and machines. Which is fine. But for this platitude-culture to work,  we expect  a willing suspension of disbelief from everyone we meet. It is hard for us to tolerate a different point of view. We say we do as long as that willing suspension of disbelief is at work. If we don't get that, we turn mean. The philosophical and/or moralistic or amoralistic guru in us, the one with the all encompassing love and compassion for all, who loves to dish out unnecessary, unhelpful advice , which by the way, we can get anywhere else, and extend promises of "being there for you" (LOL), disappears. Spitefully we hurt the stupid who dared to think out aloud, a little differently, say, he or she did not think your last speech was that great, or found it absolutely boring,!( Or, in case of promises  -- the one who promises does not expect you take up on his or her promise literally, and expect him or her to be there. That is where the "willing suspension of disbelief" comes in handy. Imagine you assuming that the grocery clerk who asks you how are you, really cares how you are! Or that if you really tells her or him about your plight, s/he will come to help! )
So this community becomes just another insular village-community of the Middle Ages. The modern element with its really Aquarian positive, friendly, tolerant energy  remains in our imaginations. In a way, again, people use each other. Some more than others. Some in the guise of a  benign welcoming, forgiving machine-like personality, actually swallows up an unsuspecting person, wringing out all the excitement and wonder of a romance, and then spitting out  what is left over.

If this is Aquarian Age, I feel disappointed. But I am hopeful that this is just the beginning. That we human beings will evolve more and more-- to be real Aquarians.